Life as I knew it…

…is changing.

The last few months have been somewhat chaotic, traumatic and stressful – to say the least.

Starting with the shop – we closed on 31st March. Heart wrenching, it’s been incredibly hard, and I’m still wading through he ton of paperwork and other stuff left to do, along with trying to deal with, quite frankly utter sadness and sometimes despair at the whole thing.

Between January and now I’ve been living at between different houses and for about a month I was living at the shop – it wasn’t that bad once there were cushions and stuff down, but it was fairly demoralising to say the least. I’m very thankful to the friends that have been putting me up, especially L and J who I’m currently staying with – for another week anyway.

So what happens in a week? I move! It’s a big scary move, because I’m not just moving house, but town and county too… the plan was always for Matty to move down here after he finished his degree, but then one of his tutors said he should do an MA, so we were trying to figure how that would work, and if we could bear another year apart, or if he could do it down here, and looking at all sorts of different options. Then i faced up to the issues with the shop, and a solution for it all was staring us in the face. I came to the conclusion that if I couldn’t have the shop – and sensibly it just couldn’t carry on – then I have to be with Matty. So we started the house hunting process, and job hunting, and found a wonderful little house in Mirfield, near Huddersfield (Where Matty goes to uni) with a lovely landlady who has been really understanding, and helpful. We get to decorate the house instead of giving a deposit, which is ace, especially as between the decorating stuff me and my mum have in storage and a big tub of white, we have enough paint and wallpaper to decorate without buying anything else!

So this time next week Matty will be on his way down here, Sunday we’re having a goodbye gathering with friends, then we go and get the keys, spend a few days decorating and then move all our crap erm, assorted valued belongings into the new house.

Job hunting is a long-winded process, and very different to how it was even a year ago which is scary, but I have faith that it’ll be okay – maybe not great, but okay.

I’m hoping once I’m settled ‘oop north’ I’ll be able to set up an online shop, and am still working on a few eventy things for next year, but I’m not going to stress myself about it. I’ve been working 60-70 hours a week and I can’t carry on doing that – at least, I can’t carry on doing that, be sane, and have a relationship, and they’re more important.

Overall the first few months of 2012 haven’t been great – there’s been a lot of crying, a lot of scary things, and a heck of a lot of moments when I just wanted to give up, but I have to keep remembering/hoping that it will work out okay…fingers crossed.

 

PS: I’ve been taking time away from the interwebs to try and deal with everything, so I’m sorry if I’ve not replied to things, I’m slowly getting back on track, but please bear with me.

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